Sunday, May 10, 2009

Of death and Mother's Day


The last one month have been the most harrowing for us as a family. Apart from several deaths of people we knew intimately, we also experienced the death of two loved ones, the first for my children and irreplacable losses for Harish...first his maternal gran'ma and then his mom. 

Losing mom... There can't be a pain that parallels that feeling of sadness and numbness.

For my children, this was the first grandparent they have lost. While Abhir was shaken up by the sight of the departed soul (I hate the words 'dead body'), placed carefully in a freezer with a glass top, stationed at home, it was Oorja who stumped me with her reactions.

After the death of gran'ma, I spoke to amma on the phone, offering what seemed like lame words of comfort (I mean, who/what can possibly console you when you've lost your maa). Then, Oorja came on line and said, "Gran'ma, I am very sorry to hear that your mom died. You must be very sad."

These were not words we'd taught her. The words represented her 'own feelings'. I was so proud of my child that day!

13 days later, we were travelling towards our hometown to partake in the final rites of amma. 

Cut to yesterday. Mother's Day eve.

I speak to Oorja over the phone (as she vacations with her brother at her maternal gran'ma's place) and she says, "I am feeling very sad for Papa. Tomorrow is Mother's Day and he will miss gran'ma."

"Dear God!" I respond.  Such sensitivity!

Today, she called and sang me a song, promising me a 'gift' when we meet. I am so proud and so happy...Im counting my blessings today!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

No words....

Please do take care of everyone.

Umesh.

AmitL said...

Sighh!!Ritu,I feel truly humbled,reading the reactions of your kids! Reminded me of Granddad passing away in '74..very faint memories,but still!

Anonymous said...

Good to see you bounce back but sad to hear about your family's losses.I hope you are having enough strength to pull and support your husband.Belated Happy Mother's day.

Vimala said...

U r a wonderful person. Ur Daughter is proving that u r a great mother. I am proud to be yr Didi.
God bless u.

Anu Vishal said...

no words........
just dont know what to write at this moment!]
take care

The Seeker said...

Loved this post! My regards to aliyan! Hoping he is fine now! And that was so sweet of oorja and am glad too know that she is growing up as such a sensitized person! And am feeling so proud of you, chechi and jiju!! Take care,

Love,
Barath

Arunima said...

Hi Ritu,

I am very sorry for the loss but, it is very nice to read about your children.

Hugs!

Unknown said...

Hi all,

Thank you so much for your wishes and support. I will be back to the blogworld as soon as Ive taken control of LIFE... :-)